Do The Dang Thing

Master Cleanser...NO! UPDATED!!

2007-01-02T07:25:00.000-05:00

I had the bright idea that I was going to clean out my colon and start "fresh" for the New Year. I did some research on the benefits of colon cleansing and became all the more interested and determined. Well, since Miss B-yonce decided the do the Master cleanse program to lose weight (it is really a cleansing and not a weight loss thing) that was what kept popping up in my google search. I read about it and only saw a few bad things. Most of the comments were very good especially for those who were doing it for the right reason. this is also known as the "Lemonade Diet".

The recipe for one day (Mix enough according to how much water you normally drink in a day or should drink in a day for those of you who are anti-water)
Recipe:
60 oz water per day (or 10 oz per glass)
12 tablespoons Organic Grade B Maple Syrup (or 2 tbsp. per glass)
12 tablespoons freshly squeezed lemon juice (or 2 tbsp. per glass)
a little over half a teaspoon of cayenne pepper (or 1/10 tsp. per glass)
I took cayenne pepper capsules from GNC (I have them and have been taking them since I was in my body building mode pre-baby - no I DID NOT take them while pregnant! I also did not add the maple syrup because, hey, I love water and lemon is adding enough wrong to it so why then add syrup?!?!? It is just to sweeten it and knock out the cayenne pepper taste as far as I am concerned. Oh and maybe for some energy too but I substituted Green Vibrance for energy and to ensure that I was getting all of my nutrients. I drank that seperately though. They have capsules for that as well and I might get those because the taste is definitely an aquired one.

Anyway heard of or tried this before?!?! Well, I tried yesterday. I woke up and started out well. I got through work fine, sipping on my concotion. I got home and was fine even with all of the aromas and food sitting around. I even picked up so food for my brother in law and did not touch a single fry. I guess the whole experience was more like fasting to my inner self so at sun down my body then went nutso and slapped me and said "woman, get me some food!!" I almost passed out trying to go upstairs at about 555 pm. After my lightheaded almost tumble down the stairs, I decided it was correct, food was in order. I made a turkey and cheese sandwich and had a few chips with it. Within 2 minutes of finishing my food, my stomach was knotted up. I raced upstairs and sat down on the toilet just in time and I stayed there for about 30-40 minutes and had to repeat about 30 minutes after that. I am telling you, it was the worse. I am not sure if it was the Green Vibrance (it was my first time drinking it although I have heard about people who swear by it) or if it was the Master Cleanse thing or a combination of the two. Whatever it was, these pipes are clean! I DO NOT want to experience that again I really do not think I could have done that (the potty experience) for 10 days. Also, if that is what B-yonce went through for however long to lose all of that weight then I would have HATED to be around her at all! I am sure she was funky! :)

Current Weight: 158 pounds
Weight loss so far: 4 pounds
Biggest Temptation: Ice Cream!
My treat: Coffee
My best discovery: Nothing

UPDATE: Not 2 minutes after I finished writing this post, I had to go to the bathroom again! Same degree of urgency...same...stuff. Well, Just as I am rounding the last corner, there is a big knock on the door. It is maintenance people wanting to come in to do some work. They say they will wait for me to come out and I hear them outside the door so I have to get up to leave for fear of embarrassing myself even more. The knock scared the mess out of me so I was shaking at this point and using my toilet tissue to try and disperse the master cleanse odor (MCO). I still felt the urge to go but not as urgent as before so I pack up my video game, my badge and my keys to go, wash my hands and decide to try and sneak out the door on the other side of the bathroom to avoid the maintenance man and his inevitable look when he gets a whiff of the MCO. Well, I walk out and straight into a pair of stilts with a huge older black man on top of them, arms crossed staring down at me. I almost crapped in my pants and fainted. I have a HUGE fear of clowns (they wear stilts sometimes you know) and of anything that either towers over me or could come running at my knees. Pretty much, anything that would cause me to have to shift my center of gravity too much. I freaked out and started to run back in the bathroom but instead just took off down the hall and into the first unlocked door. Being that today is an official government holiday hardly anyone is here except the contract workers so I thought I was safe. Oh well, hopefully they will leave soon should the urge hit me again. Of course, I refuse to try and eat anything right now...water will do.

WTH?!?! I need to get in control...

2006-12-30T21:49:00.000-05:00

So, I realize for the fifth time in the past year, that I need to gain control over my hideous weight problem. I am out shopping with the fam at the post when my father comes over to get me to show me a "nice suit" to see if I want it. He goes on and on about how sharp I would look and how all of the pieces are there (jacket, pants, skirt) and how good the suit feels (it is camel hair). I get to the rack with this suit on it and indeed, I would look sharp in it. Indeed all of the pieces to the suit are there. Indeed it did feel smoother than any other suit I have felt in life...I have to either getsomething made from camel hair or get a camel because it was smooth..but I digress. The one thing WRONG with the suit and the whole picture...it was a size 16!! I was so hurt but I tried on the jacket anyway to show him how utterly HUGE the thing is on me and to save face a bit. Do I look like I wear a freaking size 16 to the male population?!?!?! No offense to those who wear a size 16 or greater but just imagine someone coming up to you and asking you to look at an item that is 3-4 sizes larger than what you actually wear. I was cool at that moment with my father but I keep having flashbacks and I am more determined than ever. I have done well today with my eating and I plan to do some exercising when I make it into the house tonight. I will atleast move for 15 minutes if nothing else! Some squat and some jumping jacks and some push-ups. Sounds grrrrrrreat!

Also, to top things off, I have discovered that I CAN NOT maintain my blubberiness eating what I want as stated on my last post. Woe is me...5 pounds back on my hips. Some of it may be pms bloating which is also contributing to my emotional state (the pms that is) but I am sure it is my diet of french fries and ice cream catching up to me. :(

Current Weight: 160 pounds
Weight loss so far: 2 pounds
Biggest Temptation: Fast food - especially cheeseburgers and french fries!
My treat: Everything I have eaten lately has been a treat but my biggest food sin - eggnog
My best discovery: I can eat more than I could handle if I would just eat the RIGHT FOODS

These are my CONFESSIONS

2006-12-06T14:21:00.000-05:00

I have been on here for the past hour reading over all of the other weight loss blogs I have come across and now I sit here asking myself, 'Why can't that be me?!?!' What am I not doing right? Okay, okay. I know what it is. I have not been on a strict "diet" since school started and I eat late and I eat big when I do eat. Fast food has been my friend in my fast life and then if it isn't that it is some type of snack cake or something that fits easily into what little room is left in my bag or what ever will be able to withstand the varying temperature in my car from day to day. Not to mention anything that I can also share with my daughter should she be with me and happen to be hungry in a spot where I can not afford to pop open my shirt. (I tried feeding her baby carrots and I almost had an aneurysm when she started choking on a little piece she bit off. No more carrots unless they are mushy!) Anyway, that is why I have not lost any more weight and why I have actually gained some of what I had lost back. I have been hovering at 155 lbs for some time. I know if I were to get serious about watching what I eat and exercising I could do it but that is everyone right?!?! I want a magic potion to drink; something that will work overnight with no adverse effects. Fantasy, right? I know. I am too lazy. I am too tired. I have no motivation. No one is looking at me besides me and I guess I am content with where I am in some alternate universe so I have no motivation. I am not looking for a man so I don't feel pressured there. I see everyone's progress and I an genuinely proud of and happy for them but I can't see where they get the motivation from especially after many months of working out and planning meals and counting calories. It is a life change I know. So does that mean my life is bad?!?! Okay, now I am depressing myself - all 155 lbs of me...

Current Weight: 155 pounds
Weight loss so far: 7 pounds ( from 162 lbs - I am starting from where I plateaued with the weight loss from the baby)
Biggest Temptation: Fast food
My treat: Everything I have eaten lately has been a treat!
My best discovery: I can maintain my blubberiness eating what I want.

I am here!...in spirit.... :)

2006-11-09T21:04:00.000-05:00

I am here Kenz! I am a full time student as well as full time employee and forever time mom, so with finals coming up and the end of the quarter at work coming up at the SAME TIME....I am a tad bit stressed and extra extra busy! You would think that would help with the weight loss right??!? Nope! It actually just helps me to snack more without even really thinking about it. I have a little under a month until I am all done so I will be back and focused by the 2nd week in December. Thanks for missing me!

No weight loss to speak of but I am wearing my size 8 slacks again. They may be a little snug but they do zip up! Even after lunch! Yippee!

And yes CF, the cherry cordials are magical. I have passed them by in the store though so I will not snack on them all day. I was finding little foil balls everywhere! I try to suck on mints now to keep my snacking and oral fixationunder control!

Sugar freedom

2006-10-11T10:51:00.000-05:00

This past holiday weekend I decided that I was going to do 10 days with no sugar. Partially to help with weight loss and partially to keep my mind off of all of the hell going on around me in my life right now. Fasting helps, right? Anyway, I decided to start yesterday with the 10 days of sugar freedom but I caved in and ate a donut at 530 pm when the baby was crying and I was starving. I could have waited an hour until someone made it home to hold her and keep her entertained while I cooked some cabbage or something but I was "starving" so I ate the quick fix lemon filled donut. Today, I will start anew and will cut out the sweets. I had an omelet for breakfast and some water. I will have something for lunch, I am not sure what right now. Salad sounds good.... I need to be strong right now all around...

Week 3:
Current Weight: 151 pounds
Weight loss so far: 7 pounds
Biggest Temptation: Cherry Cordial Hersheys Kisses in my drawer!
My treat: French fries...hey, if I am giving up sugar I want something in its place!
My best discovery: Nothing this week....

Long time, no post!

2006-10-03T07:24:00.000-05:00

I have been on a hiatus from blogging with school books and a sick child. You would think I would have lost some weight, right?!?!? Well, you are right! Stress as well as a cold from an infant as well as running around will do it for you! I have lost some weight. I know what I weighed about a week ago when I jumped on the scale. Now I am not sure. I do know that I got into a dress I have had for some years this morning. So ... must be pretty good weight loss!

Anyway, here is a pic for today. I know the quality of it is not all the great. But I could not change my camera settings ... the battery died. :(

(Backdated) Week 2:

Current Weight: 152 pounds

Weight loss so far: 6 pounds

Biggest Temptation: Fraps or Lattes

My treat: Green Tea Soda!

My best discovery: The Giant Food Salad bar is soooo much better than the Safeway one!

New formats...new ways?!?!?

2006-09-11T07:41:00.000-05:00

I have made a new friend in weight loss and I am going to follow her lead. She has done an awesome job in losing weight and this year and she is my inspiration! She does this cool thing at the end of each of her blog entries and I am going to snatch it from her, if she doesn't mind. ;)

Here we go, starting over again, week 1:

Current Weight: 158
Weight loss so far: 0 pounds
Biggest Temptation: Brownies that my sister made this weekend
My treat: Tea and limeade (mixed) yum!
My best discovery: Thanks to the comments from the last entry, freezing soup!!

Off the Wagon

2006-09-07T07:22:00.000-05:00

I am such a bad blogger these days. I have been out of touch with you all (all 3 of you who read my blog - smile). Anyway, bad news. I have not been watching what I eat. I have gained back 7 of my 10 lost pounds. Maybe part of it is PMS bloating, so I am hopeful. I know alot of it is stress. I have it coming from all directions right now. Back on topic ... A waste pipe was clogged for a week at our house and it meant that we could not use the dishwasher, kitchen sink, washing machine, or laundry sink. So that meant no cooking unless we wanted to do dishes in the bathtub. We opted for the minimal cooking approach, which meant that we were fast food junkies for that week. Mickey D's, Miss Wendy's Place, Taco Bell and Chik-Fil-A.... we did it all. Did I opt for the "healthy" routes? Nope, I got "the usual". Maybe it was good though. Now the sight or smell of fast food makes me want to puke. A week of eating it non-stop was too much. Once we got the sink fixed, I went out and got some fresh food. I grilled some boneless chops and made some cabbage and some rice. It was so good to sit down and eat something home cooked. My colon loved it too. I need to do some more cooking and package it up to carry with me through the day so I will not make bad decisions. I made another batch of cabbage last night to go with the leftover chops. Even better the second go round. Tonight is a no cook night though. I won't make it home until late. Anyone have a good quick tasty meal recipe they want to share? Something that is highly portable and can deal with sitting out half the day while I am in class. Pasta would be so easy ... I just don't need the carbs. *Sigh*

- Signing off ... Sad and Fat me....

Weight be gone!

2006-08-10T14:55:00.000-05:00

I have my good days and then I have my bad days. The bad days are ruling though.

Long time no blog....

2006-08-03T14:21:00.000-05:00

I know it has been a while but I need to go ahead and update this because I just directed a friend to my page! LOL. So on to the new stuff....

I have lost 10 pounds! Yay me! I still have double that to go but it will be fine. I am past the plateau I was on. I am still logging my calories and I am getting better at making good food choices. I cook on the weekend so I have grilled chicken at hand for whatever: salad, sandwich, with veggies, or alone! That helps to make sure I don't just grab something else...like a cupcake!

Unfortunately, belly dancing classes ended this past Monday. The next semester does not start for a month! What is a girl to do for exercise until then?!?! I start school also the same week as belly dancing, on top of work and motherhood so I know my schedule is going to be hectic. I need to get as much exercise as possible in the next month. So....yes, my fellow bloggians...I am going to go to the gym.

I vow to myself to get into a routine where I get up early, drop the baby off, get to work and then go to the gym before getting the baby and heading home. At least for the next month that will be the routine. Then, when school starts, I can see about doing some of the classes the gym has on the weekend or the spinning classes at night. That is the plan. As my friend just told me.... "Plan your work and work your plan!" That is my goal. Thanks Eazy...I love you man.

Negative calories...

2006-07-19T15:31:00.000-05:00

Hello all. A new day and once again, renewed motivation towards weight loss!!

I am a member on this really cool calorie counting site. It has a great GUI and it is free. Two things that mean the world to me when it comes to sites I visit/use daily! So anyway, you put in what you eat and what activities you have done for the day and it adds up the calories that you have eaten and then it subtracts the calories you burn and leaves you with your net caloric intake which they show at the bottom of the page for each day of the week. To lose a pound a week you need to basically have a net deficit of 500 cal at the end of each day (deficit of 1,000 cal to lose 2 pounds a week - my goal).

It is great to have that little ticker down near the bottom of the page... so where am I going with this?!?!? Follow me.... at the top of the page you log on, there is this wonderful statement "You can eat about XXXX additional calories for [today]."

Here it comes... Wait for it.... Wait for it....

They calculate in the calories you have used up during your daily activities so if you were to never look down at the little net calorie thing you would actually be eating yourself towards being bigger or maintaining your weight! It took me about 3 weeks to get hip to the fact that hey, even if I exercise more this thing is not really telling me I can eat more....it is telling me what I could eat if I wanted to stay a lard butt!! I know my fault, I need to be smarter than the machine but hey, give me some credit. All I see is someone telling me I can eat more! Great!

So, I am back on track for real this time...I am going to try and stick with the calorie goal of 1100 calories a day. Which basically means stay out of my way because have you ever seen a hungry elephant be happy?!?!?

Fiber and Poop

2006-07-14T14:37:00.000-05:00

So, I have been desperately trying to do what is right diet wise. I have failed miserably still. I thought that blogging would help me to do better so that I would not have to post my failures for the world to see but it is not helping. Maybe because I don't have a large viewing network as of yet. Who knows. I know my cousin knows that I am not flawless. Hey, she saw my stretchmarks...all of them. LOL. Anyway, yesterday was yet another day of lackluster effort but more than enough insatiable grease filled good eats. I tried. I ate fiber one cereal and 2% milk for breakfast. Only one bowl. I had a big bottle of water. It all went downhill when my co-worker asked for a ride to McDonald's. My mind told me to say no because I know I have no will power but my tummy roared yes louder than my mouth whispered no. So off we go and of course I get something: a double cheese mighty kid's meal. It was so good. (The toy rocked too! I want to collect them all now!) To top it off, I go home from work and they have picked up some Arthur Treacher's fish and chips for dinner. That was good too. I topped it all off with a bottle of Snapple peach iced tea. Those 200 calories will be nothing on top of the 1500 worth of fish and chips and 800 worth of Mickey D's, right?!?!? Atleast I was a coffee pagan and did not worship the Starbucks' goddess...

Desperately seeking weight loss...

2006-07-12T16:47:00.000-05:00

So I have been sitting here on the net for about 30 minutes trying to figure out how I can either work
1. a medium wendy's frosty or
2. a piece of carrot cake
into my calorie counting diet while still eating a well balanced dinner. Yeah....it just is not going to happen unless I get the junior size frosty which, if any of you have seen it, would only be a sip for me! I want my sweets and I want them now! That is my nemesis when it comes to weight loss. I love sugar. I love it in any form, in/on anything. Put sugar on it and I will eat it...no lie. Wow, maybe I should do Fear Factor. Anyway, I digress...

I need to figure out a way to get around counting these calories only to fit in something that is bad for me. I need to count the calories and make a point to eat what is good for me and will give me more energy, make my hair shine, my eyes sparkle, my skin glow and my poop non-odorous. LOL. I need a balanced diet. However, I feel as if my fast food and sugar charged body will not work with me on letting go of the things I have so loved over the past years. I ate some cherries this morning for breakfast. I think my tummy is still rejecting them. I have a slight dull pain on my left side and no, I am not ovulating. Maybe it is the newfound desire to poop daily due to my ingestion of a whole new realm of organic wholesome goodness. Who knows. Anyway, I thought I would update the blog therefore doing something productive to hopefully burn a few calories so I can get back into tracking how I am going to get that dang tasty frosty or lovely carrot cake slice. I gots to DO THE DANG THING!

Second Day - No Headway....

2006-07-08T06:33:00.000-05:00

So, I wake up this morning at 540 am with a total renewed sense of life. Because of course, you can't change one thing in your life without totally recommitting to all things in your life!! I made my decision to get serious about my weight lose which means I need to get serious about my job (I actually did some work at 830 pm while I waited for time to tick away) and my finances (I created another budget), I need to totally revamp my personal space (so I will clean my room like a mad woman tomorrow if I have any energy left after today. If not, surely I will get it done in spurts next week), I renewed my vow to spend more time with my daughter at the cost of sleep (because who needs sleep to function?!?!? I made it through college without much of it so I must be a horrible mom not to take that same outlook with my child!) and it wouldn't be complete without my renewed faith in God and my salvation (I do diligently pray over my daughter and for my family but I started including myself besides the prayers for my soul and a safe journey to hell if that is really where He feels like I need to be...LOL...don't get me started on that one....that is SO another blog topic). Anyway, this renewed sense of life had me get up this morning and dress myself in yoga pants and a (nursing) tank top. LOL. I was so not heading to the gym though! I was heading in to work but I do have my yoga mat here so I figured I could get some yoga poses in before my officemate comes in for the day. ***Side note - the mat was not here in my office because I work out! LOL. It was here because I used to take my daily 2 pm naps on it when I was pregnant!*** Well, of course, after getting up that early, I needed some coffee and since I am taking better care of myself I should get some breaky-fast too. I happily drive over to Safeway and head towards the yogurt. Lowfat - check. Natural flavors - check. I grab 4 of them! LOL. I tell myself that since it is on sale, why not stock up for work next week to alternate with my oatmeal. Anyway, so I head to check out, spend $1.09 on these wonderful breaky-fast items and then looming in front of me is my morning worship goddess. I see her long flowing hair and the crown atop her head as she is encircled by my favorite morning phrase...STARBUCKS COFFEE. I know I shouldn't....there is nothing that I would get that won't cost me a meal later on in the day..but I can't help myself. I go over and happily ask the cashier to page the starbucks' lady. I feel superior. I wait in my nifty slimming all black yoga outfit with my bag of lowfat yogurt. (My cousin was discussing gym cockiness on her page - I have gym clothes cockiness) As the starbucks coffee engineer approaches I raise my nose a little higher in the air and say "VENTI CARAMEL MACCHIATTO, please" WTF?!!??! What am I thinking?!?!? VENTI?!?!? CARAMEL MACCHIATTO?!?! Do I want to eat at all today? I can't take it back though...she is already in the process of making it. I swipe, sign and move on over to the counter salivating as I think of sipping my hot liquid calorie filled goddess goodness. I can't believe myself. I just bought freaking all natural lowfat yogurt and now look at me. I walk to my car thinking to myself how to get rid of this high cal drink but I want it. I could trash it but I am too cheap for that. I could run back home and give it to one of the skinny people who could probably use the calories but I hate backtracking (OCD). I could try to find a bum and give it to him/her but that would require a trek into the city. So, here I am at my desk *sip* with my now just the right temp venti size cup of delicious caramel macchiatto *sip* eating my too red to be all natural cup of lowfat strawberry yogurt. Cheers! Tomorrow will be better.

5"1.5" and 155 pounds....

2006-07-07T10:11:00.000-05:00

And I am stuck! Early last year I was at 120 pounds. Down from 130 where I hovered for most of my collegiate career. I was fit, happy and I could fit into any jeans that were thrown my way! My booty looked right and my tummy was tight. Then, I got pregnant and it was on!

I decided that I would enjoy the pregnancy and eat what I wanted. I gained 73 pounds total. I thought that the weight would "fall" off of me in the end because I was going to breastfeed and I was going to make sure that I exercised religiously. HA! Someone should have slapped me and told me that a baby would totally disrupt any plans I had for myself! Also, that breastfeeding is a miraculous weight lose helper but it doesn't do it all! LOL. I needed to just go with the flow and let it happen when it happens.

Well, that is where I am - almost seven months post pregnancy and still majorly overweight, I am half way happy with me and still loving the occasional cheeseburger. LOL. I decided to get with the program and start getting serious about trying to make the little changes to make the big difference.

My wonderful sister got me just what I asked for on Christmas day - a year long gym membership. I have been maybe 5 times total. I need to change that and start going at least 3 times a week. My wonderful mother always takes time to notes just how many servings I am having or should be having or how many bites I should take or how many sips ...yada yada... I have people who are being totally supportive. LOL. If I was a skinny b*tch!!

No one knows how hard it is for me because they are all fit or at least skinny (yes they are two different things). I am struggling to get fit even if it does mean I am fat for life now. But the last thing I need is some skinny person, who is shoveling everything I want into their mouth without care, telling me that I should only have, at most, 3 bites of carrot cake just to get a taste and sate my cravings! ARGGHHHH!!! It just makes me want to eat the whole thing so I can feel better (i.e. full of my favorite foods) and smug. ;)

I am pledging today to start working out whether at home or at the gym and also I am going to make sure that I count my calories (going in and burning off) so that I can monitor the change in me. This blog will hopefully help me to note me shortcomings without the need to eat the whole thing and also motivate me to do my best so that you can all see how a REAL MIDDLE CLASS WORKING SINGLE MOTHER makes sure to DO THE DANG THING!!